Story Highlight
– One in five children in England has a mental health disorder.
– Referrals to emergency care increased by 10% last year.
– Long waiting lists for treatment cause parental distress.
– Parenting stress affects both children and parents’ mental health.
– Seeking support is crucial for coping and recovery.
Full Story
The mental health of children and young people in England has reached alarming levels, with current estimates suggesting that approximately one in five individuals aged eight to 25 may be experiencing a mental health disorder. This crisis has led to a notable increase in emergency care referrals, which have surged by 10% within a single year.
The impact of deteriorating mental health among children not only affects the young individuals themselves but also reverberates through their families. Parents often find themselves grappling with feelings of helplessness as they witness their children’s struggles without adequate support from available mental health services. The lengthy waiting lists for treatment can exacerbate these feelings, leaving parents in distress over their child’s wellbeing while simultaneously affecting their own mental health.
Rebekah Eames, a trauma therapist with the charity Family Action, emphasises the complexities of parenting in today’s world. “Parenting in the modern world is incredibly challenging,” she observes. “Times are tough, and families can be under a lot of pressure from all directions.” Eames highlights a particular concern for mothers, who often feel overwhelmed and neglected amid family dynamics. “When somebody is bearing the weight and carrying the emotional load for the family, that can really increase anxiety and emotional overwhelm,” she adds.
For parents who resonate with the pressures described, it is crucial to prioritise self-care while supporting their children. Eames offers several strategies to assist parents in managing their well-being.
One fundamental recommendation is to maintain connections with friends and family. “You might withdraw from relationships and activities you enjoy, feel physically fatigued, or struggle to manage daily tasks,” Eames warns. Such social disengagement can complicate recovery and well-being. Engaging in activities, such as exercise or social outings, can provide positive distractions and foster connections essential for mental resilience.
Being open and honest about one’s feelings is another strategy that parents should embrace. Eames advises against giving a façade of stability when faced with challenges. “It’s natural for adults to want to protect their children and not burden them with adult worries,” she explains. However, children are perceptive and often sense their parents’ emotional states. Demonstrating emotional honesty, such as expressing sadness or frustration, teaches children the importance of sharing their feelings.
Eames advocates a technique referred to as the 3Rs: regulate, relate, and reason. “Regulate your nervous system by doing calming activities,” she suggests. Establishing the feeling of safety enables parents to connect more effectively with their children. “When we have that sense of safety, it’s easier for us to connect and see other people’s points of view,” she adds. This communication paves the way for reasoning together about difficult emotions and mental health challenges.
For instance, if a parent is concerned about their teenager, they might consider organising a casual meal together. “Doing a nice thing takes the pressure off both of you, and being side by side makes it easier to relate and encourage openness,” Eames explains. From this relaxed setting, deeper discussions can unfold regarding lifestyle adjustments, such as exercise and reduced screen time, or even reaching out to a healthcare professional.
Another significant aspect is modelling healthy coping strategies for children. “As well as sharing and being honest about your feelings, teach children good ways to cope by demonstrating healthy coping mechanisms,” Eames recommends. Family dynamics can shift during heightened stress, and play and enjoyment can quickly fall by the wayside. Finding enjoyable yet low-cost activities, whether visiting local museums, playing board games, or simply sharing a treat at a café, can contribute greatly to familial bonds and mental health.
Furthermore, effective communication between parents is paramount. “If one parent is more engaged in understanding the mental health issues faced by their child, it can lead to disparities in involvement and strain in relationships,” Eames notes. Collaboration in responsibilities such as scheduling appointments and managing therapy conversations can alleviate the overwhelming burdens often felt by one parent alone.
Practising self-kindness is essential, particularly in the parenting journey fraught with challenges. “You are going to get things wrong sometimes,” Eames acknowledges. Whether during a misunderstanding with a child or an oversight in scheduling, she insists that these moments are part of being human. “There’s no tougher job than parenting,” she states. Apologising to children when missteps occur can foster understanding and resilience, creating an environment where mistakes are acknowledged and learned from.
For parents feeling overwhelmed, seeking additional support is crucial. Eames recommends consulting with a GP, who can provide guidance on appropriate mental health resources. Various charities, such as Mind, Samaritans, and YoungMinds, are ready to lend a helping hand. Helping organisations like Family Action also provide free helplines accessible to those needing support.
As the mental health epidemic continues to evolve, addressing these concerns is vital for the wellbeing of the finest resource of any nation—its youth. By providing vital tools and emotional support, parents can navigate these turbulent waters while fostering a secure and nurturing environment for their children, all while looking after their own mental health.
Our Thoughts
The article highlights significant concerns regarding children’s mental health and the challenges faced by parents, particularly the long waiting lists for treatment. To avoid such crises, several actions could be taken, including enhancing the accessibility and availability of mental health services, which align with the Care Act 2014. This legislation mandates local authorities to encourage individuals’ wellbeing and promote their physical and mental health.
Key safety lessons involve prioritizing mental health as a critical aspect of welfare, akin to physical health. Schools and communities should incorporate mental health education and resources, following the Children Act 1989’s guidance to ensure children’s best interests are at the forefront.
Relevant regulations breached may include inadequate provision of care services and failure to meet duty of care obligations as outlined in the Health and Safety at Work Act 1974. Implementing comprehensive risk assessments and crisis intervention plans could mitigate similar future incidents.
Preventive measures include fostering partnerships between health services, educational institutions, and families to create a supportive environment that encourages open dialogue about mental health, thereby reducing stigma and anxiety surrounding these issues.




















